Colorado Cup Bagels

whilst at colorado cup this past year, i decided to help myself to our team supply of bagels during one of our longer breaks/byes during which we were changing fields.

so i pick out a nice lookin bagel and am super happy about the bagel and i take a big bite of it and as soon as i start to chew i realize that the bagel is really soggy from unknown liquid, and for some reason, i look up and make eye contact with the coach of another team who is about 5 feet away from me right as i spit out this huge bite of gross bagel into my hand.

i kind of freeze since this is a super weird thing to have made eye contact with a stranger while doing, and he gives me a disgusted look and i hurriedly throw away the bagel in the trash can.

luckily we had already played them so there was no need for further interaction between us ever again ever.

I'm Not Creepy on Purpose, I Promise

A few years ago at YCC i was talking to one of my friends on the guys team's dad, and he was telling me about his "oldest daughter who also goes to UNC and is your year! do you know her? she majors in blahblahblah and does blahblah and whatnot"

i had no idea who she was, but being super NOT creepy i was like "oh cool ill look her up on facebook so i can recognize her and talk to her if i see her around on campus or something," which i dont consider thaaat weird considering i know her entire family..

so i find her on facebook or whatever and didnt really think anything of it until a few weeks later, when i am walking alone through the pit and some girl stops me and asks me if ive registered to vote yet.

i look up, and BAM its totally this guys daughter/my friend's sister. and so i, without thinking, am like "yeah ive registered. are you ***'s sister, *****??"

which obviously doesn't go well since we have never met and she has no idea who i am or how the actual fuck i know her name or what she looks like or that i know her whole family.

so she unsurprisingly thinks this is really creepy and is like ".....yes.... who are you? and how did you know that? and how do you know me?"

and i freak out cause i now realize how creepy it sounds to be like "your dad told me all these things about you and i know your brothers and then i looked you up on facebook" *insert non-creepy smile here*
so i stumble through some really horrible explanation of something along the lines of "oh. uh. well. i play frisbee with your brother and you came up cause i go here and you go here and i guess he must have shown me a family picture or something.. uh.. err.. yeah. well thanks for asking me if ive registered to vote"

and then i sort of ran away and havent seen her since! hooray new friendships!

The Saga of Bus Incidents

Bus Incident #1:

On my way home from class one day I decided to catch the bus outside of the student union. I got out of my building just in time to see the bus i needed pull up to the stop so i do the awkward run-with-a-full-backpack-on run in front of the group of people waiting for the bus just in time to catch it as it tries to pull away.

Which normally would be great, but the bus has already pulled a bit away from the curb.

i think i am lucky since there is a lot of traffic coming i decide to knock on the door to see if she will let me on anyway while she waits to pull into the road all the way.

However, bus driver lady does not seem to hear my knocking. so i am standing in the street repeatedly knocking on the bus door with no acknowledgment from the bus driver, but more than enough acknowledgment from the mass of people waiting behind me for other busses, and two girls sitting at the front of the bus who look out the window and are ever so kindly laughing at me.

After a solid amount of what felt like forever of ignored knocking i almost give up, but someone behind me is like "keep trying!" so i keep knocking, and the girls on the bus keep laughing and a few seconds later the bus just pulls away and leaves me standing in the street alone.

i stay there for a moment knowing that i will have to face the crowd of people behind as "that girl who just got rejected by the bus and is now standing by herself in the bus lane."

But having such an extensive knowledge of the bus system after taking them home everyday i know that if i walk briskly across campus i can probably catch the same bus when it comes back around to the other side of campus.

so i, laughing at the fact that i was just ignored by an entire bus full of people, walk across campus and make it in time to get on the bus that had previously ignored me, just to have the two girls at the front of the bus who saw me earlier bust out laughing at me as soon as i get on.

but i made it home so everything went great.

Bus Incident #2:

I am waiting for a bus outside my old apartment on the hilly part of MLK and the bus i am waiting for pulls up.

it is a very crowded bus, and it pulls away almost as soon as i get on it, so i start to make my way to the standing area right as a dude getting up and grabbing a backpack and computer shouts frantically for the bus driver to stop cause he missed his stop.

so naturally, the bus driver fucks all logic of WE ARE GOING DOWNHILL VERY FAST MAYBE I SHOULD SLOWLY BRAKE SO THAT ALL THE PEOPLE IN MOTION ON THIS BUS DONT FLY EVERYWHERE AND SMASH INTO EACH OTHER and slams on the brakes.

which of course sends large, computer-wielding, dude hurtling directly at me at a very fast pace and we collide and i am sent backwards, flailing against the front window of the bus, in the process knocking over the bus drivers trash can with one foot, hitting the bus driver with my hand, all while getting body slammed by this frantic stranger.

luckily, this commotion has caused everyone on this very full bus to stare at the loud noise caused by this collision, which most people seem to find very humorous.

public transportation is hard.

Olympians and YCC

On our way back from YCCs this year, we were told that the Olympic divers from North Carolina would be coming back around the same time that we were coming back. We thought this was just a rumor, but maybe it was true! We didn't know.

So anyway, we get off of the plane and start walking up the escalator to where people get met by friends/family to be picked up, and we see a whole slew of reporters and friends and people waiting at the end of the walkway.

At this point, we realize that the rumors are true, and my mom turns to me and says "wouldn't it be funny if they were right behind us?" and I laugh and turn around to see two people wearing USA attire and their Olympic passes right behind us. And we all kinda freak out and try to decide what to do, since we don't want to stand in front of them the whole walk towards people, but either way we are definitely going to be awkwardly in the way... So our whole group of six decides to slow down so that we aren't making a wall in front of these two people everyone wants to see and let them pass us.

So we just walk along behind them as they get filmed and clapped for and cheered. Having come back from our own tournament, we all pretend as though everyone has just heard the great news that we just got back from Minnesota and finished fifth and start waving to the crowd too. I start waving to people we pass and make eye contact with a dude who claps pointedly at me.

And that is how I got in the way of returning Olympians and how my very own waving arm was on the news.

edit: here is photographic evidence of the awkwardness that got documented by the news: http://image.cdnllnwnl.xosnetwork.com/pics32/800/ZU/ZUBBDJIDTFXISSV.20120814012228.jpg

Ipods and Doors

On my way to class, I was walking behind this girl in my class who was listening to her ipod. She and I were walking about the same speed, until we got to the door of our classroom, when she slowed down to the point where she was essentially stopped. So I am just stuck behind this girl who isn't moving and is blocking the entire doorway to our classroom, and she's listening to music so I can't ask her to move or open the door.

I clear my throat and she doesn't hear me, so I just stand insanely close to her until she opens the door, which took her at least two minutes to do. And when she finally did open the door, she only opened it wide enough for herself to go in, and let it shut behind her.

So I was left, still standing outside our classroom with a door shut in my face. Good way to start the day at 8am!

Joggin and Fives

i was running down franklin tonight and i was passing a homeless man who started to wave when we were in close proximity. it was one of those greetings where he just lifted his hand, and since my mind is always programmed for high fives, i went for the high five.
but then pulled his hand away right before contact and i nearly hit him in the face as i ran by. i tried to make it seem like i was just waving, but he totally knew...so i just kept running.

note to self: homeless men usually dont just go for high fives while you are running by, so do not try to high five them. same is true for strangers in general... life lessons.

Halloween 2012

i acquired a tiger onesie for halloween, and decided to wear it to class all day on halloween under my sweatshirt.

in my first class i took off my sweatshirt and was wearing the onesie and taking notes when my teacher asks who is going to franklin street that night. so i raised my hand and she asked me what i was going to be, and i said "this" and gestured to myself. she asked me to stand up and show the class, so i got up and stood in the row in the middle of my classroom.

then, she chooses to inquire: "tell us a little about yourself"

not knowing what direction to go with this i freeze and think of every possible way to answer this question:
do i tell my whole life story and waste a class period? do i just say my name? do i tell her my plans for the evening? do i tell her what my major is? do i explain how i came into possession of a tiger onesie? do i tell her that i ate a piece of pie for breakfast today and that it was extremely delicious? do i say a few key features? what are my key features? DO I EVEN HAVE KEY FEATURES?? OH MY GOODNESS WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE??

im freaking out so i decide, for some reason, just to say "i am a tiger." and immediately sit back down.

crisis averted.

Stair Slippin' in 175

how to avoid making lasting semester impressions: a brief guide.
dont miss the last step on the stairs of your classroom and stumble out with an exclamation and flail your arms wildly as you exit the room.

Reenactments

i was washing my hands in an empty bathroom, and thinking back to a recent conversation in which i had said something stupid.

so, like any sane person, i decided to reenact this scenario so that i can do it better in my head.

as required with any good conversation reenactment, gestures, movements and facial expressions are necessary. as i am mid concentrated facial expression and wild hand gesture with paper towel, someone walks into the bathroom.

i avoid eye contact, throw away my paper towel prop, and leave with a new scenario to replay in a different empty room later...

Swim Meet Volunteering

as a team, pleiades is trying to get money so we do some volunteering. friday, we were helping time for a swim meet in Koury. i had class at 11, so a teammate and i were going to switch shifts halfway through--i was to work from 9:15-10:15ish, and her from 10:15-12ish.

to start off this experience, i missed the first bus up to Koury. so i catch one that doesnt go quite there and start to walk. most of the way through this walk i realize that i dont know where Koury is. i am already about 5 minutes late.

i know its near the dean dome, so i walk there...and subsequently pass Koury 3 times. finally, i actually read the sign on the top of the building and feel like an idiot for the second time that day.

i go inside and see the guy who is signing people in, so i sign in, and he gives me directions to "go down the stairs, and then turn right when i see the other volunteers." i head off down the stairs, and walk down this hallway, but very shortly i reach the pool without seeing any volunteers.

i am in khakis, a jacket, and wearing a backpack. clearly i am not about to go swimming. shockingly, the swimmers i am standing directly next to also notice this. i slowly back away and retreat to the stairs.

Thrice. i feel out of place.

eventually, i retrace my steps and have to be let through a set of locked doors to find the other volunteers, but horrrayyy! we are united!

these two women come out and describe how to time, saying that if you have the same color timer as someone else you will be working together so give them to your friends! she gives me a pair of black timers, and since i am sitting at a table with ONLY ONE OTHER GUY and EVERYONE ELSE IS PAIRED UP i hand him the other timer. he pretends as though he doesnt see me giving him this timer, and refuses to take it.

i think maybe he didnt see me, so i try again, but he takes my slight flailing of the timer in front of his face to mean that he should check his texts, so i give up and awkwardly hold on to two timers. i guess i wouldnt want to work with me either.... jerkbutt.

finally, it is time for me to go to class, and my teammate to fill in. she calls me just as the meet is about to start, and as i remember how i struggled to find things, i literally run down the hall to try to find her.

and as i am on the phone, running, i turn a corner and slam into two swimmers. directly.. two very attractive tall swimmers. as i apologize and take another step, i hear my teammate call me from the direction i just came...aka right back directly past these two gentlemen i just plowed into.

i leave Koury, shamed. and with five lovely reminders that i will always have a dysfunctional life.

Rock Collections

another warning:

if you compare the color of your friend's cat's fur to those black and brown shiny, smooth rocks that came in rock collections that you got when you were younger, your friend will, in fact, think you are a dork who collected rocks. which is true.

also the black and brown shiny smooth one was very pretty. and i like cats.

Warning: The G Bus Route is Long

if you get on the G bus on the wrong side of the street, the ride you thought was going to be 15 minutes long and go directly to the library will actually take you on an hour and a half bus tour of some back neighborhoods.

at a certain point as you get deeper into these neighborhoods you realize that there are fewer and fewer people on the bus... and once you reach the end of the route, you might get called out/pitied for getting on the bus going the wrong way.

on the bright side, if you are looking to befriend a bus driver, you will have a 45 minute span of bus ride where it is just the two of you, and you can talk about a large variety of topics.

Banana Chips

yesterday, i was wearing a tanktop and eating banana chips in the library in a corner nook.

i accidentally dropped one down my shirt, so i pull my shirt back a bit to find and have both my hands in my shirt looking for this crumb.

at this exact moment, random dude walks around the corner and i go into deer in headlights mode--stare, still with my hands in my shirt, not moving. he makes eye contact with me and i just stare back.

he glances at what i'm doing, makes a skeptical sort of face, and then walks off with raised eyebrows...

found it a half a second later. hooray, coordination!

Meredith College

one day my friend and i were attempting to find Meredith College in Raleigh, but had managed to get ourselves lost, so we decided to call the college to get directions.

since i wasn't driving, i was given the task of calling and asking directions.

precursor (although at this point it's mid-cursor?) to this story: i suck at talking on the phone and suck at directions--two great qualifications for a person to call a stranger and ask for directions.

anyway, i call, and some girl named jessie picks up:

Jessie: hi this is jessie at meredith college, how may i help you?
me: hey, my friend and i are lost. we are on a road called (whats it called?) fairfax? or maybe its something with an M? i see a cvs and a green fence.
Jessie: um.....right. let me put you through to a raleigh native.
*brief period of no noise and awkward desk background noises in which i think that jessie has accidentally forgotten to connect me to raleigh native lady*
Girl who i think is Jessie: hello?
me: its me again!
Girl who i think is Jessie: .....who? ...again??
me: the girl you just talked to!
Girl who i think is Jessie: .......
me: who is this?
Girl who i think is Jessie: Rachel.
me: oh.
Rachel: yeah.
me: ........ we are lost.

apparently meredith college has one driveway pretty much in the center of town, who knew?! except for rachel, obvs.

Wrong Car

on friday enroute to regionals with pleiades, one of asian teammates came to pick me up from my dorm.

so i start to walk down the stairs of the dorm, and i see her car through the window in the staircase so i stop paying attention to her and start looking at my phone and whatnot and i continue to walk out of the staircase and down towards where her car was waiting for me.

i get to where her car was, and there is a car that looks like her car, so i tap on the trunk since i have to put my bag in the back without walking around to the front first, and the trunk opens.

as i go to put my bag in the back i realize that the only things in the back are a pair of high heels and a bundt pan, which i think are relatively odd things to bring to sectionals in place of ultimate gear. but still, this for some unbeknownst reason does not register to me as too odd.

my bag tucked nicely away in the back of this car, i walk around to the passenger side, where the window is open. i have my hand on the handle and start to say into the window "Sweet heels and bundt pan..." and as i move my face down to actually look into the car for the first time, i realize that the person driving the car is not, in fact, my teammate, but a random, old asian woman.

at this point i freak out a bit and begin to apologize profusely, to which she stares at me for about a minute and then pauses for a moment to ask "did you just put something in my trunk?" a question to which i feel the need to continue to apologize more, since i just shoved my dirty ultimate gear in this random old lady's car.

i got my stuff out of her trunk to see my teammate waving at me from a parking spot a bit further down the driveway by my dorm and i was only hoping that random high-heel-owning asian woman doesn't think i am a total idiot, or a racist.

although i still dont understand why she opened her trunk for me (maybe she confused me with her asian son???) a lot of apologizing occurred and quite a few death glares where shot my way as i headed to the car i was supposed to be in (one with out high heels, bundt pans, and where the average age in the car was less than 50) and finally was off to sectionals ...

Rest Stop Cleaning

on my way up to virginia with an ultimate team, we stopped at a rest stop to use the bathroom.

when we went in, some woman was sweeping the floor around the sinks and by the door and such. so we just walk around her and go use the bathroom.

however, while i was using the bathroom, i see this broom just come under the stall door and i realize that the cleaning woman is sweeping the floor of the stall like an inch from my feet. apparently stall cleaning waits for no one.

i decided to wait in there for a moment until she was done, although the urge to mess with the broom was very tempting...

Sweatshirt

last week i woke up running a bit late for class. i was just wearing a sports bra and shorts and only had time to grab and put on one shirt item. it was a little chilly so i just went for sweatshirt.
i walked really fast to class, and when i got there i was a little hot, so i started to take off my sweatshirt, and got it about halfway off before i remembered that it would probably be frowned upon to sit in class in just a sports bra, especially in the first row.
but at least i remembered before i took it off all the way!

Right Answer, Wrong Response

in spanish class today my professor asked a question, and i answered it correctly, but i answered it really quietly because i wasnt sure if it was right.

since i answered with a whisper, my professor asked me what i said.

this made me nervous, and i said "ah! nada" and made dont-look-at-me hand motions and pretended to cough as though thats what i did accidentally in the first place and drank some water to legitimize this obviously super fake cough.

then some other girl said what i said, only louder, and the professor said it was right.

so i missed out on some quality spanish praise, and only got quality strange spanish looks.

Sorry

i was in a rush while leaving my dorm today, and someone held the door for me. Being silly and in a rush, instead of saying thank you, i said sorry by accident...

she looked confused and asked me "why would you be sorry??"

But since i was running and not expecting any sort of real interaction with the girl that held the door for me, i ended up shouting over my shoulder "i dont know! i didnt mean to, im sorry!"

then i realized that i apologized for apologizing at least twice.
so i just kept running the opposite direction from the girl who held the door for me.

Ash Wednesday

i almost told a girl she had something on her forehead today until i got closer and realized it was in the shape of a cross...
and that it was ash wednesday... whooops